Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Point of Decision

"For many are called, but few are chosen."
Matthew 22:14
My personal belief is that few choose.

My day's work ended and I headed to the appointment I had arranged with the post chaplain Karen had spoken with. I was ready to make my case.

This man could have cared less about what kind of woman Karen was. All he cared about was the life of my baby that I was so ready to discard like a piece of trash. God used this man named Peter Borovec like a chisel plow on my cold, stony heart to see if there might be a hint of fertile ground down deep where seeds of righteousness could have a chance to grow.

chisel plow

A chisel plow is the first implement used in preparation for spring planting after the ground has lain fallow all winter. Fallow ground usually has a hard crust that a disc plow could only barely scratch the surface of until a chisel plow prepares it for the next step. The chisel plow has huge metal chisels that can sink deep into the ground and rip the stony surface crust open.

After the chisel plow is used the ground is ready for the disc plow.

disc plow

I was a young warrant officer in the United States Army. I was also a military instructor pilot. This is a little embarrassing, but when God raked that chisel plow through my cold, stony heart I was reduced to tears. My heart had been prepared to where God could now speak to me and find out what kind of decision I would now make.

Peter also told me that I could never expect a relationship to be blessed and workout unless I got truly right with God first.

When Peter was done with me I went and knelt in the chapel to pray. God came and spoke to me clearly. It wasn't audible, but I heard His voice almost as if it were. This is the conversation we had:

"David, you think you're alright, but I'm telling you there is nothing right about you. Especially with the things you have been holding to lately."

My response, "I know I'm not no saint, but who is in this day and age?"

"David, if you want to be alright, it is time for you to start seeking My son Jesus with your whole heart, soul, and mind. If you don't want to do that, then you just need to go to the devil and know who you belong to. Cause I don't want anything to do with you, and don't you ever feel good toward Me again."

"Whoa!" I thought. Those were strong words. I loved straddling the fence feeling good toward God and delving in the ways of the world mostly in promiscuity and drunkenness. God was telling me to pick the side of the fence I wanted to land on. He had brought me to a serious point of decision. I could no longer have it both ways with what he was telling me. He would no longer allow me to straddle the fence!

God then took me on a tour of the dark side if I chose not to follow Him and start seeking His son Jesus with my whole heart. He said, "If you're a little short on money, I've given you a smart enough brain where you can figure out how to rob a bank and get away with it."

I liked money as much as the next guy, but I'd never been interested in robbing banks. It was like God was telling me that if I didn't want Him it just no longer mattered what I did or what level of wrong doing I took it to.

Next He told me, "If you want to sleep with a woman and she tells you no, take it anyhow. What's she gonna do?"

"Whoa!" I liked sleeping with women, but I didn't want to rape any of them. God seemed to be telling me that my righteousness was like filthy rags compared to His and if I didn't want Him why have any semblance of righteousness.

I believe most people sin through ignorance. They just really don't understand the true nature of sin or its consequences until they or someone they love suffers from the unrighteousness they engage in. Then there are a few who truly have black hearts and don't care about the degree of depravity they engage in or the harm it causes others to experience.

One thing I knew was that I liked feeling good toward God no matter how much I liked my current lifestyle. God was telling me to make up my mind because He would no longer tolerate me having both. I took a hard look at the dark side. I have a personality that is subject to the power of suggestion. I figured that if I rejected God it wouldn't be long before I might find myself engaging in those things He had shown me. I also had enough sense to know that if I did pick those seemingly worse behaviors up I probably wouldn't last too long even though He told me I had a smart enough mind to figure out how to get away with it. I didn't think that was a good side of the fence to jump off on no matter how much I enjoyed and liked my current debauched lifestyle that the world seemed so quick to champion.

I made my decision. I wanted to go with God no matter the cost. I made a commitment right then and there to choose God and start seeking Him with all my heart, soul, and mind. I also invited Jesus to come into my heart and help me on my journey.

There is no doubt in my mind that was the moment I was born again. God had a big job ahead of Him to clean me up, but He is fully capable. I didn't have an overnight transformation, but I would begin heading in the right direction from that point onward, and God along with His son Jesus would help me along the way cleansing me from the sin I previously sought out and enjoyed so much.

"Doing wickedness is like sport to a fool, And so is wisdom to a man of understanding." Proverbs 10:23

It was a life changing decision for me that I have never regretted.

Lord willing there will be more tall tales from both before and after my born again experience. If you have a personal relationship with Jesus I pray you rejoice in my unworthy redemption. If you don't have a personal relationship with Jesus I pray this story stirs your soul and makes you curious. Jesus desires for you too to make it through the narrow gate. Simply ask Him to help you on the journey and I believe you will find Him faithful. He is no respecter of persons. If He can do it for my undeserving self, He can do it for you. I've been on both sides of the spectrum and I know from personal experience that it is good over here. Come and taste and see!

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me." Revelation 3:20


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